m., e., and l. all have their noses stuck in their computers because they got a fancy new-fangled thing called the internet. let's all hope they come up for air. before internet came along, m. busied herself with trying to arrange a date for l. and e. swam in her personal olympic sized pool. l. continues to draw scribbles. sometimes they resemble people. usually not.

also, earlier today, m. was startled by a burglar who stole all her belts and hair supplies who had gotten in through the doggie door. 

the cast of the ham has been enjoying their increasing fame as they attended a fair held just for them where they received lots of free stuff. they were one of the few people in the country to receive kosher water blessed by the greatest rabbi of all time, matisyahu. as well as pizza made by italians. then they totally partied it up with chilibeermac. but mostly things have been pretty lame around the ham because of lame things happening around them so it has been pretty lame.

season 2

season 2 has begun with l.'s arrival to the loft on sunday with her move-in crew hauling all of her stuff behind her. despite excitement l. had to finally have some time alone, e. decided to move in earlier than expected causing l. to have an artist fit where she holed herself up in the book nook grumbling to herself and drawing big circle scribbles over and over for the rest of the night. e. spent the day reacquainting herself with her rubik's cube. m. showed up to the party late after her latest sugar daddy decided to get rid of her sleek black sport car (we can't name brands or we'll be sued..... again) so that she could "actually get a feel for the real world." thanks to that "real world" experience she oh so desperately needed, her lovely new car (if you can call it that) decided that the drive to the city was a bit too much for her to handle and decided to crap out halfway through. thanks to a lovely, finely muscled local boy the car was able to make it here. that's m. for you. always trying to be fashionably late. besides m. being late and the lovely circle scribbles that are littered around the loft, things are off to a grand start.

xoxo.

this is a report to report that there is not anything to report.

let the countdown begin! season 2 of the ham will be premiering in about a month! until then, i'm sure you're enjoying all the reruns of last season's drama and you'll be lucky enough to be treated to a summer special to introduce you all to the ham's new loft- the tempest coming next week. 

xoxo.

a short summer update from sources close to the cast of the ham.

e. and her boyfriend survived paradise with each other, believe it or not.

m. and l. have been experimenting with baked goods with the help of t. perhaps for the opening of their newest business endeavor--a bakery?

l. is laying low passed out on pain killers from a recent facial reconstruction. let's hope this one will heal better than her last one....

t. moved and hasn't been seen or heard of since.

and finally,

e. has kicked everyone out of h5cs to work on a "chemistry project." (it's probably best if we don't know all the details of this one so that we don't have to lie when it inevitably goes to court.)

stay cool through the summer and i'll keep you updated as news filters in,

xoxo.

thursdays are for: dinner dates and finding out t. has friends besides m., e. and l.! 

at least, he has a friend. sources are trying to figure out if it's actually a stranger t. payed to pretend to be his friend. either way, aren't they cute?? they even sort of match.

t. is headed up to canada for the night with his "friend," supposedly to gamble (another addiction),but from his history, it's likely he's headed up there to score some quality drugs. not even m.'s good friend dr. phil could help and now he's headed up to our northern friend to get stuff "you can't even find here!"

e. and l. are headed for a day trip to china to promote the release of the ham followed by a quiet chinese lunch. then e. will be headed to a 253 party for a birthday celebration. m. plans to study hard for the end of the school year by also heading south to the big city for an alcolbration.

don't say the ham never left with a bang. the pressure's building, and when it blows, it's sure to be explosive. let's just hope someone will be there to pick up the pieces.

signing off,

xoxo